A Letter to Love Yourself

You tears will sow the soil where you stepped,

And all of the Earth’s elements will return to itself.

The energy of pain has not been lost to nothing.

That growth has been given to everything that is missing.

 

Love will not be lackluster,

For people will love you despite all your plunder.

And your flaws will never feel like a chasm between you and others

Because flaws made the stories that you will both remember.

 

Love all your relationships without holding back—no matter how small—

But you have already done that,

Which is why you are sad.

 

No accumulation of flaws can ever be enough to make you worth less than.

Your resilience to heartbreak and disappointment will always make you a whole and better person.

 

And you have known what sacrifice looks like your whole life

As you patiently wait for The One to finally arrive.

 

Now you want that person to see all that you have given.

Yet,

Despite your abundance and warmth,

You often feel like a skeleton.

 

Harried and hollow,

Still searching for a haven to rest your head safely,

Weep your tears and freely express your sorrow.

 

Nothing.

Nobody.

 

Nothing is ever enough to win their affection.

If they ever made you work for it,

Then it was already lost from the beginning.

 

You sought the light in others that you hoped others would do for you.

A light that is loud and unfiltered.

Unbothered by the perceived compatibilities of your spectrums,

Giving only white light commitment.

A light that does not believe that things are ugly,

Which is also not afraid to meet you in places that are uncomfy.

 

You have already made yourself vulnerable to them.

Please just make it as painless as possible.

Just hand us a life vest before this ship sinks.

Don’t steer us into an iceberg while saying you love me.

 

You are looking for the patience to love you through all this.

You bury yourself in all these good memories,

The Bad sometimes still lingering at your fingertips.

 

It’s like a sci-fi movie

What these memories do to you.

You are transported back every time wondering how you could have changed the truth.

Make them change their mind.
But

It was already made up.

Nothing you can do.

 

You can only hope that karma will return the kindness,

But you wish karma could grant you blindness,

So that you would never be blinded by love again.

 

It’s easier to be cold,

But just the slightest bit of warmth is enough to light your hopes.

Without much hesitation you will go back to kindling the fire

Crafting that dangerous cycle of despair and desire.

 

I could go on and tell you more,

But I know this is not the kind of love you are looking for.

I don’t want to see you do what you would never let me do to myself.

Let’s forget all our troubles,

Remember our own advice.

And accept that our mistake was in being too nice.

Too patient.

Too kind.

 

Your hand has been mangled

Bruised

Beaten

Neglected

Scarred

Before you ever let go.

Even though you were the one to cut ties

You were the one who hurt the most.

 

I could never hold myself together if I didn’t have you.

You’re my last resort and my first love too.

You taught me that patience and pain are what make us people

We let ourselves hope with the utterance “I need you.”

 

It’s ok that

We all feel sad sometimes

But I will never let that be the reason we say goodbye.

Truly it is the only reason I still have you by my side.